I, being a growing young lad, have recently been acquiring a greater and greater ability to grow semi legitimate facial hair. I have yet to attain this capability in full measure – I know that. But none the less I have noted that my abilities are steadily increasing. This has caused me to wonder 1) whether or not I am now capable of growing a moderately legitimate group of facial hair and 2) if “yes,” exactly how long would that take.
In an attempt to answer those two questions, I have decided to embark on a journey. But I’m afraid I will be utterly incapable of completing this journey alone. I need your help. That is why I would like to invite you to join me as I chronicle my Journey Toward Attaining a Moderately Legitimate Patch of Facial Hairs on My Chinny-Chin-Chin (or JTAMLPFHMCCC for short). The primary way you can assist me is through encouraging comments and continued prayer throughout the duration of this JTAMLPFHMCCC.
The Current Condition
My facial hair growing abilities have yet to spread over the entirety of my face (see chart below, click here for an XL view). So, for example, I already know that an attempt to grow a mustache would be in vain. But I would postulate that those areas of stronger growth – like on my chin – just might be able to produce enough good hairs (i.e. the ones that aren’t blond or clear) to be visible from more than two feet away.
This JTAMLPFHMCCC will either confirm as true or denounce as false that postulation.
Terms and Conditions
Lord willing, beginning tomorrow with a clean shaven face I’ll post a status update and a picture of my progress every 3 days (as is, 3 days might just be too frequent; if I allowed less time than 3 days, there would be little to no discernible difference between the pictures). This JTAMLPFHMCCC will last until one of the following things happens:
- I actually attain a MLPFHMCCC,
- I become too discouraged by my lack of progress,
- I become discouraged by the growing amount of comments on my posts making fun of my (lack of) ability to grow facial hair,
- the people with whom I interact on a day-to-day basis tell me that I’ve joined the ranks of the thousands of other young guys who insist on growing scraggly little patches of peach-fuzz,
- I become too discouraged due to clauses 2, 3, and 4 all happening simultaneously,
- I decided to opt out of this JTAMLPFHMCCC for any other reason not stated in 1, 2, 3, 4, or 5.
My budding facial hairs greatly appreciate your comments and prayers!